Mama moosehunter vs. the Commie menace

My favorite redhead at the Noo Yawk Times, Maureen "O'Sullivan" Dowd, has her panties all in a wad again. This time it's the audacity of McCain to pick a good lookin' babe, as Rush calls her.

Maureen dips her poison pen and comes up with what I'm sure she sees as a ridiculous movie script starring the Norse queen and formerly obscure moosehunter, VP Sarah Palin, who moves up to the top job and then has a showdown vs. the Commie menace:

The movie ends with the former beauty queen shaking out her pinned-up hair, taking off her glasses, slipping on ruby red peep-toe platform heels that reveal a pink French-style pedicure, and facing down Vladimir Putin in an island in the Bering Strait. Putting away her breast pump, she points her rifle and informs him frostily that she has some expertise in Russia because it’s close to Alaska. “Back off, Commie dude,” she says. “I’m a much better shot than Cheney.”

Then she takes off in her seaplane and lands on the White House lawn, near the new ice fishing hole and hockey rink. The “First Dude,” as she calls the hunky Eskimo in the East Wing, waits on his snowmobile with the kids — Track (named after high school track meets), Bristol (after Bristol Bay where they did commercial fishing), Willow (after a community in Alaska), Piper (just a cool name) and Trig (Norse for “strength.”)

“The P.T.A. is great preparation for dealing with the K.G.B.,” President Palin murmurs to Todd, as they kiss in the final scene while she changes Trig’s diaper. “Now that Georgia’s safe, how ’bout I cook you up some caribou hot dogs and moose stew for dinner, babe?”

I'm sure that's supposed to be ridicule, but there's one little problem, Maureen honey. It sounds like a movie I'd go to see, along with all my bitter, backwoods redneck buddies as we cling to our God and our guns. You can come with me to the show, Maureen, if you promise to shut up.